At the End of 2013

At the end of this year we want to be thankful for all the things that God has done for us.   We have had many changes in our life this year.  Our oldest child graduated from High School in May.   She moved out in the fall and started college in August.  My other two biological children are both in high school and you can imagine how busy it is. We also got to meet our two boys we are going to adopt for the first time.   This was absolutely amazing.   We were excited and we tried not to scare them but we may have been a little overwhelming.   By the end of our visit they were laughing and playing and melting our hearts.   At this end of 2013 we want to share that first meeting with our boys when we first got to hold them and touch them.  It is about 14 minutes if you have the time to watch.   For us, and for those two, we will always have this memory to share.

Our hopes and prayers are that by this time next year our boys will be home and our entire family will be together for the Christmas holidays.

Merry Christmas to all and have a happy new year.

Christmas 2013

Christmas is coming quickly and we finally have the house decorated for this joyful time.   The only thing missing are our two boys from Haiti to make our family complete.   We have hung their stockings at the fireplace so that Santa will know they are coming, but sadly they will not be with us on Christmas Morning to join in the festivities.   Our hope and prayer is that they will be with us next Christmas, and we will leave that in God's powerful hands.  I will put a picture of that fireplace and notice the CCM  stocking and DCM stocking on the end will make us a family of seven total.  Some people count our dog Lucy as eight, but she is not going to get into the official count in my book.

We also received two more pictures of the boys that were taken within the month.   These pictures are always awesome for us because we can keep their photo books up to date.   They are growing each day and it is hard for us to see them grow up without us, but we know we will make up for lost time when they get here and give them the love and attention that every child needs.  

Davidson (November 2013)

Cherdinor (November 2013)

On 12/15/13 it will make 15 months now that our paperwork has been in IBESR with no movement.  I do not know if we are in that department or waiting on the President's desk for dispensation but if we will get dispensation and out of IBESR at the first of this next year maybe they will get home by next Christmas.  This is our prayer every day.  It will be time once again at the beginning of next year to update our fingerprints and get our I-600A updated to stay current until we can go further in this process.  Everything on our end is completed and we just have to wait.

Thanks to everyone following our blog for the continued prayers and for the nice comments that you have sent our way.   We will do our best to keep you updated this next year as things develop.

Merry Christmas to all!!!!!!!!!!!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

Happy Thanksgiving to all of our family and friends.   We have so much to be thankful for because GOD has blessed us so much.   As I sit with a full belly, watching the Dallas Cowboys beat Oakland on a beautiful Thanksgiving day with all my family around, laughing, playing and doing what families do,  I cannot help but be thankful.  I know our life is not perfect, no one's life is, but we are blessed far beyond most.  I can not help but think about our Haitian boys and hoping that this will be there last Thanksgiving without us and next year they can be here with us.  I have no idea what they did for Thanksgiving dinner today but I know they are well taken care of until we get them.  We want them with us as soon as possible and this is my Thanksgiving prayer.

Here are Thanksgiving/Christmas pictures early for us to enjoy.  I hope that everyone's Thanksgiving has been awesome.

                                          Davidson, Darby, and Cherdinor 2013

                                          Davidson and Cherdinor 2013

                                          Davidson and Cherdinor 2013

                                                        Davidson 2013

                                                        Cherdinor 2013

                                                       Davidson, Darby, and Cherdinor 2013

                                            Davidson, Darby, and Cherdinor 2013

                                           Davidson, Darby, and Cherdinor 2013

                                           Davidson, Darby, and Cherdinor 2013

We took these pictures in June when we were there but I have been saving them to post around Christmas and could not wait any longer.  

Ironic

When we moved into this house we had thought about adoption, but we were not really that close.   There was a child's room on the downstairs that had this mural  painted on the wall with these words.   We had thought about painting over it but did not.  We later knew this was going to be our Haitian boys' room when they come, so we had matching bed spreads made with Winnie the Pooh characters.   I was in there the other day, and I can honestly say I have never paid attention to the words actually written on the wall and as I read them seemingly for the first time I thought,  "How appropriate for our new addition."  I can't wait to have that room filled with little boys and lots of love .

Waiting

It has been a long time since I have posted and a lot that is due to how busy we are.  My three biological children keep me busy in the fall of the year.  My oldest daughter plays soccer for Freed-Hardeman University.  My son plays high school football at Chester County High School.  My youngest daughter is a high school soccer player at Chester County High School.  Each night of the week is usually a mad dash to a ball field somewhere in West Tennessee.  It is so enjoyable to watch our kids participate in sports but it does keep us on our toes.

Here are some pictures from our fall sports.

                                                                     DARBY

                                                           
                                                                        WILSON

                                                                      MADELYN

The main reason I have not posted is because I have no new news to report.  We continue to skype with our boys every two weeks in Haiti and this is a joy.   They gradually become more talkative with us, but it is hard for them since they do not know English well.  Today it has been exactly 14 months since our paperwork was handed over to IBESR with no movement that we know about.   WE assume that our paperwork is in dispensation waiting for the President's signature.  The new law is soon to be signed that will bring in Hague Adoptions in Haiti, and we do not know how that will affect us.  We know that we will not need dispensation under this new law.  Maybe our paperwork will be ready to leave IBESR then, but we are not sure.

So we wait....So we pray....and we will continue to skype with our boys.

Here are two pictures of the boys that we received in October from other adoptive families who have been taking pictures for all of us.

                                                              CHERDINOR  (on the right)

                                                                      DAVIDSON

We hope that you all will continue to pray with us that these boys will get to our family soon so we can continue to teach them about GOD and about how special they are in HIS eyes.   We will pray every day ourselves and we will wait.  I am gaining a new appreciation for this word,  wait.  Here are some of those feelings in poem form.

                                                           I WAIT

As a hind catcher poised on his toes with glove extended waits for the pitcher to make that perfect crisp snap of the ball in his leather glove,
enthusiastically, eagerly,
I wait.

As a farmer watches his tender plants while looking in the sky for any furtive cloud that might signal much needed rain,
longingly, uncontrollably,
I wait.

As a father stands by the side of his beautiful young wife for the birth of their first born child,
dutifully, exultantly,
I wait.

As a fisherman sits by the side of the water with pole in hand watching all day for his float to be pulled under water without success,
pensively, patiently,
I wait.

I am an adoptive parent who is waiting for his children to come home,
enthusiastically, eagerly, longingly, uncontrollably, dutifully, exultantly, pensively, patiently,
I wait.

R. Scott Miskelly

Some Thoughts from my Heart

This Poem is based on Ephesians the first chapter.  I thought about us all being adopted by God our Father and this poem to our boys in Haiti came out.

Ephesians 1: 5  "....he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will,...."




We Are All Adopted


You may not have my eyes, my son,
     you may not look like me.
And gazing in the mirror,
     my genes you can not see.

But you will have my name, my son,
     and you will have my heart.
You will know I love you because
     God's love I will impart.

For I was once adopted, too
    God took me as HIS own.
HE washed away my sins, and
     no more was I alone.

It won't be too much longer,
    I think that you will see,
My name, my heart, and with GOD's love
    a family we will be.


Love,   your DAD


Author   R. Scott Miskelly

Updated pictures of our Boys.

I just recently found updated photos of our boys and wanted to share them with you.  Cherdinor is 6 years old and Davidson is 4 years old now.   They are becoming more handsome every day.

Cherdinor

 

 

 

Davidson

 

 

We also wanted to post a picture of the orphanage where they are living.   They are being well taken care of but we can not wait to get them here.  This orphanage will be a part of their memory and heritage and we will always be thankful for Hal and Chris and the work they do in Haiti.

 

 

 

Everything is still quiet with our paperwork still in IBESR.  Laws seem to be changing and we are not sure how this will effect us, but we will leave all of that in God's hands.  Continue to pray for us for the patience to see these boys home and the strength to help these boys become soldiers for Christ.





 

Life Goes On (some more)......

We have started back the new school year for our biological children and we are all having a blast.  My oldest daughter plays soccer for Freed-Hardeman University and she has started her first year of college life.

My son is a sophomore at Chester County High School and he kicks for the high school football team.  He is a good soccer player, too.



My third child is a freshman and Chester County High School and she also plays soccer and basketball.

 

 

We love to be busy, and their activities keep us hopping.   We have not heard anything from our Haitian boys.   We did get to talk with them today and they were quiet as usual.  It was still good talking with them.  One of these days they will be playing ball here, too.  Davidson had a birthday in August, and he is now 4 years old.  I told him next year we will celebrate his birthday with a pool party.  I do not think he knew what that was.  On September 15 will be the one year anniversary of our paperwork being presented to IBESR to be approved.   No word of any kind yet but I am hearing that the new adoptions laws have passed both houses and maybe that will do away with our dispensation need, thus our paperwork will get into the court system a little quicker.  We just continue to pray and it will move quickly so we can get our boys here.  We know it will be here one day just like another fall season of sports has come again. 

 

Hope everyone is having a great Labor Day weekend!!!!!

 



Time is Moving so Quickly/Slowly.....It is all in Perspective.

This past week we moved our oldest child into a dormitory at Freed-Hardeman University.  She is the first of our children to move out.   She did not go far but the absence is still there.  As we were driving around last night with our 16 year old and 14 year old we noticed it is still not the same.  The whole group is not together.  We discussed how we wished that time would slow down because before long our Sophomore and Freshman in high school will be graduating.  Time moves so quickly...

I thought about this last night as I was going to sleep.  We have been praying everyday that our Haitian boys will get to us quickly not really thinking that the quicker time passes, the quicker our children will be leaving us.  We do seem to be fickle.

"Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow.  What is your life?  You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes."  James 4:14.

Time seems to be moving agonizingly snail-paced with our adoption.  We saw our boys at the beginning of June in Haiti, and we have only skyped with them once since then.   It was a joy talking with them, and they are so full of life.   We want them here right now so we can teach them how to be a family, how to love God, and to be able to read them Bible stories every night like we did our older children.  We know they are in good orphanage and being cared for well, but nothing has moved with our paperwork, that we can see, since September 15, 2012.   Time moves so slowly......


God will get our boys to us in HIS time and HE will also take care of our older children as they grow up and leave the nest.   Our job is to just teach them all about HIM and be the example that we need to be to point them to HIM.   Give us all the patience to persevere no matter the situation.

Found Some Cute Pictures...

There is not much going on with our adoption right now other than waiting for paperwork in IBESR and dispensation.  We continue to pray for things to move quickly and we will leave all of that in God's hands.  I did find some cute pictures of the boys taken by Julie Manfred and I will post them for you.   They just make me smile. 

 

Father's Day Wish

Wishing everyone a great Father's Day today.  I don't know if you can remember when your child first said "Papa" or "Daddy", but I know that moment sticks in your mind.  For my three older children I got to share in every first word, first step, and every milestone.  For my two boys in Haiti it is time to make some new firsts and memories since we have missed out on their early childhood.  My five children are all special and I am thankful that God has trusted me and my wife with them, and our goal is to continue teaching them about HIM.

Cherdinor and Darby play football.

I can not tell you, at one time, what a wonderful time we had with our boys in Haiti.  Christy and I truly fell in love with these boys.  I wanted to introduce one of the new Chester County football stars of the future.  Here is a video of this football prospect.  We do have a few years to go and a little practice....

He is a beautiful boy and will fit right in with our family.  He is quiet, polite, and just wanted to play.

I wanted you all to meet my knewest baseball/soccer player, Davidson.  We've got a long way to go but he sure is determined.  We love the time we had to play ball with him.  As soon as we brought the ball out he livened up and was all grins the rest of the day.

His feet were clubbed at birth and he has had surgery and casting, but still not where he needs to be.  I am going to look for some knew footwear to send him as soon as possible.

Back From Haiti........

Wow, what a week in Haiti.   Our mobile medical clinic saw over 1,900 people in 5 clinics from Sarthe to Santo.  We worked in 5 subdivisions of Port-au-Prince and it was awsome.  We came back exhausted.   The biggest excitement of the trip was seeing our boys for the first time.  I can not tell you how much emotions we felt last Sunday.  We played, we hugged, and we cried.  We tried so hard to build a bond so they will know who we are.  Here are our beautiful boys with Darby right in the middle.  I will post some more pictures and some videos in the next few weeks.

 

 

 

Almost packed

We are packing and getting ready for our trip next week.  I can not tell you how excited my family is.  We have been working hard to get things ready and the time is getting close.

One of the things that we made for our boys was a family book.  Here a a few pictures from the book and we recorded messages with the pages.  I think they will enjoy this and can't wait to give it to them.

"God,

We pray for safety, for courage, for peace,
always knowing that you are in control of all things, amen."

Miskelly Family

All is quiet.....

Today has been a great day with my family as we get ready for my oldest daughter to graduate high school this next week.  It is a big milestone for every child and we are excited for her.  She has a scholarship to play Soccer at Freed-Hardeman University in the fall so she will spend most of her summer getting ready for this.

Still not much movement on our adoption.  We are still in IBESR and not sure if we are on the President's desk waiting for dispensation or just in process.  We are leaving this all in God's hands, and we are at peace.

We are excited about our upcoming Mission Trip to Haiti.  My wife, my oldest daughter and I will be traveling at the end of this Month to spend a week in Port-au-Prince overseeing a portable medical clinic in several areas of the city.  The great thing is we will get to spend a whole day with our boys.  This will be the first time we have met with them in person.  We are trying to think of the best gift for them but what do you take to an orphanage.  I can remember when I met each one of my children in the delivery room for the first time.   This will be different but I can honestly say we are just as nervous and excited as then.  We will take lots of pictures to post.

I will leave you today with a family picture that we took before Award's Banquet the other night.

Another Skype Day goes by.........

We were able to skype when we got home from church tonight.   Our oldest daughter is graduating from high school and we were busy all day with events and we thought we were not going to be able to talk with the boys today.  Hal, who is Chris Nungester's husband, was so nice and caught the boys right before they went to bed for us to talk with.   They usually are very quiet when we talk with them which is normal for three and five year old children.  Tonight they told us both that they loved us and it was so precious.   These little bits of time bring us closer to them, and we know that one day we will be reading them a Bible story before bed every night.  It has been 7 months now that our paper work has been in IBESR with another month coming around the corner.  No dispensation in sight.  God has everything in his hands though, and we continue to pray.

God has our little ones in his hands and that is all we need to know.

Good night Cherdinor...
Good night Davidson...

We will hold you soon!!!!!

Love, Mom and Dad

Words of Wisdom

Still all quiet this week.  No news or movement of our paperwork.   :( 

We did skype with the boys last Saturday and they had just gotten up from their naps and were really quiet.

Five children from the orphanage received their dispensations last week and there seems to be no rhyme or reason who will be next.  I am so proud for the other families, but saddened that our process is not moving faster.

 I know that God is watching over our paperwork, and it will continue to move along as he watches over it.  I know that he hears our prayers.  It is still difficult to wait.  I am amazed at Abraham and his patience as he waited on God's promise of a son.  If anyone else is waiting on the Lord to answer your prayers, remember that Hebrews 6:12-15 tells us to be  "followers of them who through faith and patience inherit the promises.  For when God made promise to Abraham, because he could swear by no greater, he sware by himself, Saying, Surely blessing I will bless thee, and multiplying I will multiply thee.  And so, after he had patiently ENDURED, he obtained the promise."

Boys, we are praying you will get here as quickly as you can.  God answers prayers, so we will keep waiting and praying.

Here is some poetry from the Old Testament for all who love children and are planning big families.  Remember God is watching over us and giving us sleep.  

"Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it:  except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.  It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep.  Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord and the fruit of the womb is his reward.  As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth.  Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them:  they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with enemies in the gate."  Psalms 127

I like the part where Christians do not have to stay up late worrying or get up early worrying because God gives HIS beloved sleep.   We will continue to wait and pray.

They have  just posted the updated sponsorship pictures of Cherdinor and Davidson and these pictures were made in February of 2013.

They are extremely handsome fellas.

I hope they are both having a great day today!!!!

The Color of My Skin

Skyped with the boys today.  They each had a ball in their hand that we sent to them as a present.   They had just gotten them this morning and they would not let them go.  They were very talkative today.   Still no word on paperwork and we are still in dispensation and have been for almost 6 months.

There was some painting going on at the orphanage last week and found a picture of the baby beds outside for nap time.   Davidson is in the bed on the far right and I could tell it was him by the braces on his feet.

I also found an older picture of Cherdinor coloring and will post it, too.

 I was sitting doing charts today and some more poetry came to my mind.  If you are going to follow this blog you will have to put up with some of my attempts at poetry.  I was thinking about the issue of color and race which does not matter at all to me or my family.   But there are always others that might make this an issue.  So, here are my thoughts.

The Color of My Skin

If someone asks about the color of your skin,
      tell him, "It's not the outside that matters, but what beams from within."

Like a package wrapped in brown paper and string,
     how can you tell the joy it will bring?

It is not until you open it and see with your eyes
     that you finally determine the value of your prize.

So look into the mirror and smile so big and wide
     because only YOU know the treasure hidden inside.


R. Scott Miskelly

Encouragement For the Day !!

We all need a little pick me up along the way.  This cartoon was shared with me via facebook and it made me smile today.  I will share it with all of you who are adopting or who are adopted. 

The Haitian Adoption Process

Many people have asked me why our adoption is taking so long.  I have no better explanation than to tell you the exact process of adopting in Haiti.  It pretty much self explains why this takes so long. If this does not interest you then just skip this post.  The information is taken from Diana Boni's blogspot, and she works for All Blessings International and BRESMA which runs an orphanage in Port-au-Prince.  Her blog spot gives me the most detailed information about the happenings of adoption in haiti and it is at kashaiti.blogspot.com.

The Haitian Adoption Process

Haitian adoptions are highly complex and challenging to complete. Under Haitian law, they can be completed by an attorney or a director of one of the creches licensed by IBESR - the equivalent of Haitian social services. Most Haitian adoptions are accomplished by creche directors acting as facilitators. Very few attorneys have the extensive amount of time and dedication required to process an adoption case.

The many steps listed below must be followed for each and every adoption. Add to their number the extreme difficulty of accomplishing each one: every step must be accomplished in person and by hand. Most of the offices listed do not have computers. There will be no communications by fax or email or even by official phone calls. Facilitators must visit each office personally to check on the status of each case, and carry it by hand through the traffic of Port-au-Prince to the next stage of the process.

Pre-IBESR
Before an adoption case can be presented to IBESR the adoption facilitator must gather all of the following documents:

1. Intake interview for biological parents with IBESR
2. Passport pictures of the child
3. Birth Certificate
4. Attestation of signature on Birth Certificate or extract from the National Archives
5. Legal relinquishment of custody from the biological family to the orphanage from the local judge
6. Psychological evaluation
7. Medical evaluation
8. Laboratory tests
9. Social history
10. Proces Verbal (A court process in which the biological family grants the creche the right to place their child with your family specifically for international adoption. Can only be completed after your dossier is in Haiti.)

IBESR and Dispensation
Your dossier can now be submitted to IBESR. If your family meets all age and marriage/cohabitation criteria, and either parent has biological children, your dossier can be pre-approved for Presidential Dispensation and delivered to the Presidential Palace by IBESR. Important note: Presidential Dispensation is only for families with biological children. There can be no Dispensation requested or granted for parents' age, length of marriage, etc. Dispensations are published in the Haitian legal journal Le Moniteur. Following Dispensation, IBESR will sign off on your dossier and grant an Authorization of Adoption.

Lower Courts
In many districts, including Port-au-Prince, adoptive parents must appear before the local Tribunal court and Dean to sign their agreement to the adoption. Both parents must be present with the child.

Parquet Court
The 'step' we refer to as Parquet court is actually a very complex series of steps and processes involving multiple offices and repeated trips between them.

1. Attorney addresses a Request for Judgment to the Chief Justice of Parquet Court
2. Birth parents are interviewed in Parquet Court
3. Parquet Court signs off on "approval judgement for adoption"
4. Facilitator takes approval to DGI for stamp of authorization
5. Back to Parquet for enforcement of the approval judgement
6. Authorization and redaction from the Civil Registrar Officer for legal Adoption Decree
7. Verification in Parquet of the adoption documents by the Civil Registrar before signing the adoption decree
8. First Legalization of the Adoption Decree, in Parquet Court
9. Second Legalization of the Adoption Decree, at the Ministry of Justice
10. Third Legalization of the Adoption Decree, at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs
11. Obtain attestation of Adoption Decree from the National Archives

Ministry of the Interior
All international adoption cases are reviewed by the Ministry of Interior. In order to obtain authorization to request a passport, the following documents must be submitted for each child:

1. Four passport sized pictures
2. Birth Certificate
3. Attestation for the Birth Certificate
4. Extract from the National Archives for the Birth Certificate
5. Relinquishment
6. Proces Verbal of adoption
7. Adoption approval judgement
8. Adoption Decree
9. Attestation of the Adoption Decree
10. Power of Attorney for creche director and/or attorney
11. Stamp from DGI
12. Notary letter for the passport
13. Identification card of facilitator and/or attorney on the case
14. Biological parents' identification cards
15. Adoptive parents' MOI form, identification, and passport photos

The Ministry of Interior will grant authorization to submit the dossier to Haitian Immigrations for a passport.

Haitian Immigrations
The facilitator will submit authorization to apply for a passport to Haitian Immigrations. This is generally a quick process - one to two weeks, if all equipment is working properly.

US Immigrations
Note to international readers - US Immigrations performs the most rigorous investigation of international adoptions. Other nations' Immigrations process are different. Please check with your agency to learn about the process for your home country.)

Parts of the US Immigrations process can occur concurrently with the Haitian process, however USCIS cannot sign off on the case until they have verified the final Adoption Decree and the child's passport. DNA may be requested at any time.

American families are advised to work closely with their agencies to ensure a smooth and efficient US Immigrations process for their child.

Approximately three to four weeks following completion of all USCIS investigations and adjudication of the I600 for the child, the case will be forwarded to the Department of State for issuance of a Visa. The Department of State also has the right to request DNA testing for birth parent and child. Adoptive parents need not be present for the Visa appointment.

Parents who can prove that they visited their child prior to the issuance of the Adoption Decree by Parquet Court will be issued an IR-3 Visa. Their children will be automatically granted full US Citizenship upon arrival in the US.

Families who did not visit their children prior to the date of the Adoption Decree must file for citizenship for their children. Failure to file for citizenship will leave the child as a legal immigrant and unprotected by the rights of full citizenship. Please refer to the USCIS website for form N-600 and instructions on how to file.

Summary
These steps were provided by Margarette Saint Fleur of BRESMA orphanage. All legitimate adoptions facilitators must follow each one of them, and must do so under extremely difficult conditions.

Haitian adoptions take far, far too long. Children wait in orphanages for months and even years while the adoption proceedings drag on. And yet, when we look at the immensely complicated process, we must realize what a miracle it is when each child comes home.

When you travel to pick up your child at last, thank the people who made your adoption possible. No amount of money could ever cover the exhaustion and frustration they endure for each case, and most of them work for very little or no pay at all. Their reward is seeing the children they live for go home with families who will love and cherish them for the rest of their lives.

Thank your Haitian adoption facilitator by telling her how grateful you are for her work, and thank her by sending her pictures over the years of your child growing up safe and happy. It is their sacrifices that make our adoptions and our families possible.

I am so excited, we found some baby pictures of Cherdinor in with a mission team's photo set.  We are trying to make them a baby book and trying to accumulate as many pictures as we can.   I had none of Cherdinor under 2 or 3 until these.  He is about 7 months old in these pictures and they were taken about December of 2007.  He is a cutie!!!

 

 

Update on progress:  Nothing moving with paperwork, and still no word.  We have heard that some other families at the ophanage are moving along and we are so pleased for them.  We believe we are still sitting in dispensation waiting for presidential signature due to us having biological children already.  We continue to pray that these boys will get to us quickly.  Once the paperwork gets out of IBESR things will hopely move more quickly.  On February 15th our paperwork has been in IBESR for 5 months.  It needs to get out of there quickly for us to continue to plan to have them home for Christmas this year.  Say a prayer for us today!!!